A Prayer For Matt

Dear God,
  
    Please take care of him.  Let him know how much he was loved.  I walk down the hallways at school and people around me are crying, Matt's locker is decorated with pictures and notes, memories of the good times.  I can't help but wonder what made him do it, but no matter what it was, I'm sure there was a better solution.  Everyone feels a hole in there heart.  He effected everyone around him, whether he knew it or not, he did.  People who never knew him, miss him.  Just tell him that he meant so much to everyone.  No one can recall any bad times with Matt, only happy memories.

We love you Matt, and you're memory will never fade away.

                                                Amen

-Anonymous

A New Found Closeness

:        I don't even know what to write. All of these emotions have swept over me, overwhelming me in their presence, filling me with compassion, confusion, and pain. It saddens me to walk through the hallways and hear all the familiar, cheerful chatter of the other students, innocent and carefree, and then to set foot in the junior hallway and not hear a sound, see not a smile, only feel the blanket of silence wrap itself around me.
         I think that it is very important for most of us to understand what has happened and as frustrating as it is, there is no true reason or justification to pin this tragedy to. All we need is love right now and compassion and sympathy and comfort for one another and we will all get through this tragedy. Even as all the commotion distracts me, I constantly am picking this apart, trying to rationalize, trying to understand, and it has left me right where I had started, with nothing.
         There has been some good that has come in result to this event, however. It has truly brought out junior class closer, allowed us to bond with one another as we comfort each other in this time of need. I will never forget, after learning of this, walking down the hallways and seeing all the faces. Every single person was solemn, every eye had a tear in it, every heart had been broken. Suddenly, people you hadn't spoken to in years or people you had never spoken to at all, stopped you and embraced you. That feeling, of everyone being there for each other, is something that I will never forget and never want to forget.
         So, at least we can honestly say that this tragedy has not just left us feeling empty, out hearts shattered. It has also drawn us closer together and made each and every one of us a friend.

-Anonymous

Matt's Memory Will Live In Our Minds And his Soul Within Ours

        Sometimes in life people touch us way such indescribable ways that we ourselves fail to notice the magnitude of it.  Unfortunately, we don't notice until that touch has left us eternally.  Matt represented all that was good in a person.  Seeing him there, in his casket, with his eyes closed and his hands wrapped around a pair of goggles, I then, more than I had ever wish for anything in my life, prayed that his eyes would just open.  That his loving eyes would open and he'd laugh and we'd all awaken from this hellish nightmare that we so deeply are in.  Seeing him there, his eyes closed and his face pale pink from the makeup they put on his cheeks, his lips closed and painted, an image entered my mind.  His face disappeared.  It thought of a person.  No one I knew.  That wasn't Matt.  Matt was full of life.  I also thought of people I knew.  What if in Matt's place, my closest friend was lying?  Matt taught a lesson that people so rarely learn.  Knowing how life's throws things at us that we may not be prepared to handle.  But we must, as difficult as it may be, push forward.  We must learn to put aside our petty differences and look for the more important picture- acceptance.  Even in death Matt has affected our lives in a way we can not explain.  In time, our social structure will begin to reform, "cliques" will group again, and life will go on.  This is good because people are healing.  After the healing has taken effect, everyone will reflect upon Matt and how he blessed our lives.  We will remember him for what he was and always will be.  A good person. 

~~~~~*******---HIS LIFE TAUGHT US TO KNOW THAT WE ARE LOVED.  HIS DEATH TAUGHT US TO KNOW OUR DUTY IS TO LOVE OTHERS.---******~~~~~ 

Matt's memory will live in our minds and his soul within ours.

-In Loving Memory Of Matthew Adam Kane-

Remember Matt As The Great Person That He Was

        On The 17 of November a great caring, athletic and loving kid took his own life. His name was Matt Kane. No one will ever know why he he felt like that, I mean to anyone else he was a happy kid, who liked to make other people laugh and was always here to help anyone who needed him. In the last couple days i have only heard good things about Matt and like me, no one could really understand why he did this. I didn't know Matt that well, but i know his sister well and i also know how much she and the rest of her family loved Matt. Although this is such a terrible tragedy, I think that everyone should learn something from it. I know that at Berkeley everyone has come closer and will remember Matt forever. I would just like  to ask that we all remember Matt as the great person that he was and not what he did. I would also like to ask that everyone keep Matt's family and Matt in their prayers.

            We will miss you Matt and just so you know we do care and we would have listened to you anytime that you needed to talk.
            
-In Loving Memory Of Matt Kane

Too Good For This World...

        When I heard the news I was shocked.  I felt so much sorrow for his family, friends, and him.  I didn't know Matt personally, but I knew who he was.  I knew of his many talents, great personality, and his good looks.  He was the person that people looked at and wished to be.  Maybe that was too much for him.  No one understands why he would do this.  I keep telling myself to remember him, and forget what happened, but I can't.  I just don't understand.  He had so much going for him.  How he saw a "sea of cold, empty eyes" I don't know, because there was so much love for him everywhere.  Its true that there are many people like that, but then there are others with warm, loving eyes.  I wish he could have looked into the ocean of warm, loving eyes instead of what he actually saw.  Maybe he was too good and had too much goodness for this world and time.......

-Anonymous

My Only Thoughts

My only thoughts - Keep Matt in your hearts, your souls and in your minds.  Keep his spirit alive.  Have the strength that he did not to carry on.  And above all "USE YOUR VOICE".

-Anonymous

Rmember Matt for who he was, Not For His Mistake

     Even though I didn't know Matt personally, I knew him through what many of his friends told me about him.  I had talked to him enough myself to realize that he was a very funny person who always made others laugh.   Matt was everything that everyone else said about him.  Going to the wake and the funeral, hearing the cries from so many people, touched me deeply to see so many who cared for and loved Matt.  I pray for him and his family everyday, and hope they can find comfort in the love and support of friends and themselves.  We all have to remember Matt for who he was, not for his mistake.  And that's all it was, a mistake.  We cannot blame anyone for the mistake, we can only accept it and try to remember Matt for the outstanding person that he was. 

We love you Matt!  I know you are in a better place now, and i hope you find happiness.

-Anonymous

The Only Way We Can Make Sense of Such A Tragedy

        Matt was one of the best people I have ever honestly met.  He was one of those people who had a special gift, a contagious ability to make the people around him happy.  It is amazing that even though he was feeling such pain and misery inside, he never wanted to drag anyone down.  And so he picked us all up instead.  He made us laugh until we fell out of our seats.  He would embarrass himself to make everyone else happy.  He was one of the few geniunely nice people I have ever known.  He would do anything to make us laugh, to brighten our days.  I just wish I might be able to do what he did now, to make people happy when they are down.  The only thing we can do now is become better people in light of such a tradgedy.  We owe it to Matt.  It's what he would've wanted.  He touched us so many times with his life.  But just because he's gone doesn't mean he can't touch us anymore.  We can live life the way Matt did, always to the fullest and always putting others before himself.  Make it your commitment to yourself, to God, and most importantly, to our beloved friend Matt.  Become a better person.  It's the only way we can make sense of such an unfortunate and senseless tradgedy.  And Matt, I will never forget you, and I'll try my best to make people smile the way only you could.

~A Close Friend~

A Lesson To Be Learned

Its so ironic that the boy voted "most optomistic"in eigth grade, the one that could always make you laugh, the one who seemed to have it all, could die so tragically.  We all loved everything about Matt, infact i can't think of one bad thing about him.  But he didn't know it.  He never knew how much everyone appreciated his presence.  I'm not saying anyone should feel guilty, but there is a lesson to be learned.  It is not enough just to know you love and care about someone, it is necessary to share your feelings with them.  I wish I had told him how much he meant to me.  I wish i had told matt a lot of things, but i didn't, and i can't change that now.  I know i'm not the only one with these regrets, however instead of concentrating on these wishes, we should take them and learn from them.  Our chance with Matt is gone, however, God gives us thousands of other chances with everyone else we meet.  Take your regrets and be sure youll never be able to regret them with anyone else ever again.

I will never forget Matt.  Never forget the happy memories.  I've known him since first grade, when we were in the same class.  I remember middle school, especially Mrs. Brown's seventh grade science class.  I remember freshman year.  I have many memories.  I still have the letter he wrote me after i moved, and DrFstone will remain on my buddy list.  I love him and will never ever forget him.  He knows now how much we all loved him, and i know he watches us all everyday from heaven.  He's in a happier place now, we should be happy too.

I pray for Matt, his family and friends, and all those who are suffering depression, that they may recieve the courage to ask for help.

-Tara McDonnell
  Tara_McDonnell@hotmail.com

Parental View

To Matts friends and family:

Raising kids does not come with an instruction booklet written by the manufacturer.  There are no guarenteed steps to raise a perfect child.
Nothing even that says if you treat each of your children the same they will turn out the same. 

Each of you are unique. 
You come with your individual gifts and talents that will leave a mark on the world you are intended to effect.
Don't waste those opportunites.

It is obvious that Matt had a positive effect on many of your lives.
Hang on to those gifts and precious memories.
Use them to change your world (big or small) to be a slightly better place.

We didn't get to keep Matt as long as we had wanted.
But we are painfully reminded we can learn to love each other better.
Make sure we give everyone the oppourtunity to express doubt and failure (real or perceived). Honest people who share their personal stories will tell you they have both.  Be honest so others can be honest with you.

Many parents ache for the parents of Matt. 
Much like your pain of losing a classmate, we mourn the young talent we will not see bloom and bear fruit for an extended lifetime.  We identify with his parents who tried so hard to love a child and are dismayed that he couldn't percieve enough of that love that terrible night to find alternatives to his pain.

Your ability to face danger although afraid is the true meaning of courage.
Be couragous.  Strive to make a difference in your world.  Hold each other in love and respect each others differences.  You are the herbs of life, whose gifts and talents are need in this world.  
Love one another.

-A Loving Parent

"Love Your Neighbor As You Love Yourself"

So many people have written to say that they and countless others loved Matt.  The problem is, and was, that no one seemed to have informed Matt about this.  At least, not in a way that he understood and was clear to him.  We can not bring Matt back, but we can all pledge to do a most difficult thing for most of mankind... tell those you love that you do now.  It is so easy to say 'I loved you so much' when someone is dead. 

Why is it so hard for us to say 'I love you!?!?', because we risk rejection.  When someone is dead, they cannot reject anyone, so it is so easy to pour out our loving words.

Today, and tomorrow, and everyday of your life, tell those around you that you love them.  They will call you crazy; so what?  It is best said by Jesus: 'Love your neighbor as you love yourself?'

-Anonymous

If Only

The life of matt was more than he thought.
I didnt even know matt and I have seen how much people really care for him.
They are grieving over him.
If he knew how much pain he caused he would realized what he did was wrong

-Anonymous

IN REMEMBRANCE OF A SPIRIT THAT WILL BURN ON FOREVER

        I know that it may not seem like much, but i fell i must also write something on behalf of a great person, Matthew Kane. Matt may not have been my best friend in the world, but for all that knew him, we all know that he had a great soul. His comical personality, his great athletic ability, and his intelligence were going to carry him far in his life, but unluckily he saw there was no where to turn to in him time. Hopefully, Matt has taught all of us out there a lesson, through his actions, that if there is ever a time where you feel as if you no longer belong; find someone, ANYONE, and let out your feelings, express your fears, and just maybe that person can be the one that you can give credit to for making you see the good in life. If Matt had maybe found that one person and let his feelings spill he may have had a very different outlook on life. Life is such a percious thing that should be cherished at all moments, because it's short, and you never know what will happen next. Let's just all pray that Matt has had a safe journey to heaven, and that God will be with him always, for he was a wonderful person that will always be remembered in the hearts of others. For those of you who did know Matt, keep your memories of him fond, to find a place of comfort in your time of grief. Let's all pray that his spirit lives on for years to come.
        - Matt if only you could see us all now, how many people loved, and cared about you. For some of us you were the highight of our day, if we were down, you made us laugh. You are one of the greatest people that ever set foot on this earth, and it's too bad that you couldn't find that just one person to talk to. You will be in our memories always. I hope that where you are now you are safe, and free of pain.-

-Love Always,
        Anonymous

SLACK

Matt,to many of us who didn't really know him, was sort of someone that you knew who he was and maybe had a class with him.  I had the pleasure of being in a class with Matt for the last two years and through that time period, he has made me laugh.  He could always lighten up a room. My fondest memory of him is when he wrote in big letters "SLACK" on his chest in pen and took of his shirt when Mr. Slack wasn't looking.  That was the type of thing that Matt would do just to make people laugh. He warmed all our hearts...We will miss you Matt...

-J. S.

A Person I knew Long Ago

I remember a boy from elementary school.  A boy who was funny, popular (even for elementary school).  A boy who had his whole life ahead of him.  I knew him when i went to his school in Basking Ridge.  But I have move away from Basking Ridge to Washington.  I have move away but not forgotten.  I have never forgotten anyone that I knew in that town or that went to that elementary school.  I never forgot that boy.  I have lived my life since then thinking that everything was okay in the small town of Basking Ridge.  I come back every summer to visit.  On November 17, I received a phone call, a call that I thought that I would never receive.  A call from my best friend.  She called to tell me about the tragic event that had unfolded.  She called to tell me about the loss of Matt.  I was speechless when I heard.  I thought that it could not be true.  It was almost like it was unreal.  Now granted he most likely never remembered me and granted most of my other friend most likely don't remember me.  However, I still remember all of them and I still worry and wonder about them and when I heard the news I cried in my heart.  I wonder why.  Why could a brilliant, popular, funny boy take his own life? 
As I sit here and look through pictures of my friends, I come across a picture of a group of boys.  All happy, and carefree.  However, I look at the picture and one boy is missing.  He is missing and gone forever from the world that we live in.  However, not gone from our memories, hearts, souls, and prayer.  He will always be there and he will never leave.

A friend in Washington state

-A Friend In Washington State

This is how you make the pain better

        I wish everyone would focus on what good Matt's life brought to all of us instead of the pain that his death caused us. Instead of saying, Matt died 6 months ago how about saying 1 year ago matt and i went to the movies and he made me laugh. Because in the end, he should be remembered for the intelligent, kind, funny and nice person he was. Not the one mistake he made in his life that ended it. But I do still think about Matt, but only about the good memories, and I guess I'm the only one who misses him because no one talks about him anymore. Its not a bad thing to say "hey remember when matt....."

-Anonymous